• They are not always true, they often seem real because they have been with us for some time.
• They can be changed to an empowering belief.
• They can run our lives without us being aware of them if we don't take the time to work with them.
• They are a personal thing, what seems important to me may be totally irrelevant or insignificant to you.

1. Identify your limiting belief and state it clearly
2. Check whether it is useful in any way or any situation
3. If it's not useful, we can change it completely, if it is useful in some situations, we can keep it for those and change it for situations where it is limiting.
4. Notice whether the belief is still true for you.  Do you know when you decided to believe it?
   For some beliefs it is simply a matter of being aware that it is no longer true, and this allows you to let it go easily.

For deeper or more emotionally charged beliefs we recommend you do a Belief Change process with a qualified practitioner to ensure the process is completed safely and with ecology.

• I'm not good with money
• I'm not good at anything
• I'm not good at relationships
• Relationships never work out for me
• I'm not a good learner
• Nobody loves me
• I always come last
• I'm not popular
• I'm not a good person
• I'm a procrastinator
• I never finish anything
• I'm not wealthy
• I'm not confident
• And the list goes on...

Life is a journey made up of one step at a time.  Each step takes us in a direction that we have chosen, consciously or subconsciously.  Some steps happen quickly, some happen slowly, some are up hill, some are downhill. You may find yourself taking a left or a right turn, or perhaps moving straight ahead.  The key is to keep moving and enjoy every step.   

Life is not about the destination but the experiences along the way.

So Robyn, where are you heading

Author: Robyn Simpson from Choose The 'Tude!

Inspire 10 people to inspire 10 people… pass it on!

 

Imagine yourself on holiday… in an idyllic place or space, magically relaxing, doing only what you love. Imagine who is with you, the smells, sights and sounds. Pressures are eliminated. You can choose what ever you want to do at any given moment. Hear the laughter and music, smell the aromas of food and flora. Imagine the best holiday ever!

How often is your life like that? Is that something you want more of? If so, let’s look at how you can make that happen.

Assessing the gap
Look at your usual every day life. How different is it from the perfect holiday you’ve just imagined? Consider every aspect and on a scale of 1 – 10 assess each area of daily life against your ideal state of living you experience on holiday. For example, take laughter. How much laughter do you have in your daily life compared to your ideal life? Measure each on a scale so you can give it some perspective. If your ideal life has just the right amount of laughter – rate it as 10. Rate your daily laughter against that.

Continue this process with other areas that are important to you. For example, spending time with family, reading a magazine, doing new things, sitting and relaxing, or exploring...

Creating more
Now take a look at your list and ask yourself "How can I create this on a daily basis?” Brainstorm as many ways as possible for each area. Let ideas flow without judgment. Allow your subconscious mind to present ideas over the next day or two. Write them down. Go for at least 10 ways to achieve each one and make them compelling.

It is helpful to get in touch with the feeling of having the desired state while you do this exercise. If you can create the feeling you will be more creative and motivated to find ways to achieve it easily.

Busting blocks
Take the top five feelings or experiences and ask yourself "What prevents me having more of this in my everyday life?”

It is important to do this in a non-judgmental way. Be completely honest with yourself. No criticizing allowed. Check if what prevents you is an excuse. Remember the purpose of this exercise is to help you experience more of what you really want now.

For more information on blocks and how to bust them, check out www.choosethetude.com/Free/Articles.html and look up the Goals are Dreams with Deadlines articles.

Final step
Act as if you already have these things happening in your every day life. How would life be if you really did live in the moment, enjoying all the things you want and love right now? What would you be doing?

What have you been missing? Why save the good things for special occasions? Special occasions may not happen. Today is a special occasion for you to enjoy, so fill it with everything you enjoy. It’s your choice.

We are free to choose our experience daily. Since the conversation with my friend I have begun to choose to experience ‘now’ all the time.

I still have dreams for the future, and I sometimes look at the past. What’s important is that I know I’m choosing this and I can choose what’s good about now, now!

Simple techniques like this are very powerful. Life is meant to be simple. So what are you missing?

Final tip… A great way to start your day is to consciously choose your attitude so it starts off positively. Our ‘Smell the Roses’ range can help you get in the mood to relax and take time to appreciate the simple things in life and enjoy ‘now’. For inspiration in this area click here...

Author: Robyn Simpson from Choose The 'Tude!

 

Inspire 10 people to inspire 10 people... pass it on!

As a brief reminder, Blocks are things (real or imagined) which get in the way and prevent us from taking action and succeeding. Breaks are strategies we can use to break down the blocks and subsequently achieve our goals.

 

Block 5. Choosing a goal to please someone else
We often choose a goal because we are influenced by, or want to please someone else – parents, partners, spouses or children. We may not be aware that’s why we’ve chosen the goal. If you feel you have chosen a goal because you ‘should’, check whether it’s really your goal.

BREAK IT: Take a good look at what you will get from achieving the goal. What’s in it for you? This is really important. You are much more likely to achieve a goal and be motivated to achieve more if it is something you really want. When you achieve goals you inspire others to do the same.

 

Block 6. Lack of action
It’s not enough to know what you want, write it down and give it a deadline. You need to take action every day! If you find yourself procrastinating, consider what is getting in your way.

BREAK IT: Refer to Part I of this article – Blocks 2-4 and Block 5 above. Achieving goals takes some commitment on your part. If you don’t have the right skills yet, take action to learn them. If the goal seems overwhelming, break it into smaller achievable chunks and work through them. Make sure you reward yourself for each achievement. Remember – every little bit counts!

 

Block 7. Lack of resources – usually time or money
I can't do it. I don't have the money. I don't have enough time. I would be retired if I'd been given a $1 for each time I’ve heard these excuses.

BREAK IT: Check how much you really want to achieve this goal. If you really value it you will put the time, money and effort into achieving it. If you don’t have enough money, brainstorm ways to save or earn what you need. Learn more about good money habits (check out The Resource Centre for help). If you don’t have enough time, prioritise what’s important to you and make appointments for yourself in your diary to ensure you give enough time to what’s really important. I do this with work and personal commitments and it works incredibly well.

There are many more reasons why people don’t achieve their goals. But it’s time to look at some tips to help you achieve your goals.

 

Remember…

1. A true goal is one you will spend energy, time and resources on to achieve.

2. Be clear on what you want. If you’re not clear then refine your goal each day until you are.

3. State your goals in positive language. What you focus on is what you get.

4. Give your dream a deadline. This will get your subconscious to focus on achieving it and you will begin
noticing things you hadn’t previously.

5. Imagine it done - use all your senses to make your imagined picture as real as possible. Describe how it
feels, what it looks like, the colours, movement, your thoughts, responses from other people, words you will
hear or use. The more real you can make it in your mind, the more likely you will achieve your desired
outcome.

6. Write it down and review it every day. Keep focused.

7. Pursue it with reckless abandon – well, at least lots of energy and focus.

8. If you’re not giving your goal attention, time, energy or resources then check what is getting in your way and
remove the Blocks or perhaps review the goal.

9. Achieve mini goals that contribute to the ultimate goal. As Michael Berman and David Brown (authors of The
Power of Metaphor) state "When there is an immediate positive reinforcement, serotonin is released in the
brain inducing a sense of well-being and security”. Success leads to success.

10. Talk to someone who will support you in achieving the goal. Telling someone increases your commitment to
being successful.

11. Celebrate little victories – every little bit counts.

Although these sound simple, the more of these tips you use in the pursuit of your goals the more likely you are to achieve them.

 

I can speak from personal experience – so I encourage you to start dreaming and turn them into reality.

Choose the ‘Tude is all about attitudes and giving people the resources to help them achieve their goals. This business was a dream that’s become a reality by giving it a deadline and using these tips. We hope they support you in the pursuit of your goals. Best wishes!

Author: Robyn Simpson from Choose The 'Tude!

Inspire 10 people to inspire 10 people… pass it on!

Do you have everything you want? Are you where you thought you would be at this stage in your life? No? A contributing factor could be your goals, how you set them, and achieve them - or not.


Whilst discussing an idea I was formulating for a new business with a colleague of mine two statements were made that really stuck with me about goal setting. Firstly, my colleague commented that he didn't like to set goals because if he didn't achieve them he would feel he had failed. His question "Why put myself out there?"

Secondly, he referred to me as 'a dreamer' insinuating that dreaming was a waste of time and not particularly productive. My response "Yes, I'm a dreamer. But I dream with deadlines."

I strongly believe people can achieve anything they want if they put their mind to it. So, what stops us from setting goals? What stops us from achieving them? Blocks! These are things that get in the way (real or imagined) that stop us from taking action and succeeding. I'd like to share with you some of the blocks I've identified and strategies for breaking these blocks.

Block 1. Constant dreaming - No time frame
This often leads to no action being taken. There is no urgency to achieve the dream, so it tends to float along, never really eventuating other than in your head. "I'm gonna..." is the case here and rarely 'gonna' eventuates.

BREAK IT: Take a look at how much you really want to make this dream a reality. If it's something you are seriously passionate about achieving then put a deadline on it. When you put a deadline on a dream it becomes a goal and the subconscious mind begins to find ways to make it happen. What you focus on is what you get.

The common misconception here is that if you miss a deadline, you have failed. This is only true if you choose it to be so. If you find yourself in this situation, take stock of all the things you achieved along the way. Congratulate yourself for them, and set another deadline by which to meet your ultimate goal.

Remember, goals are dreams with deadlines and deadlines work! As an example, an exciting new design based on this concept has eventuated for this company Choose the 'Tude Ltd. Check these out here.

Block 2. Worrying about what others will think about you
How do you feel about achieving this goal? Do you fear what other people might think or say? Do you worry that you may fail if you attempt it? How will that make you feel? If you're focusing on the negatives and what might happen, that's what will happen.

BREAK IT: Reality check! People haven't said or thought anything yet because you haven't done anything! And whose goal is it? Yours! So don't worry about what other people have to say. Get on with it and take some action.

Block 3. Not believing in yourself
We are our own worst critics! Humans are complex creatures. Our minds, past behaviours and beliefs often get in the way - even though they may bear little relevance to our situation today.

BREAK IT: Identifying and getting rid of limiting beliefs about ourselves and our abilities can take a bit of work. There is no quick fix here. If you identify the belief that is getting in your way you can begin to work with it. You can get a coach or learn how to deal with it yourself through training or reading (see our Resources Section for help here). This is a great investment in your future!

Change is happening every moment and is often something out of our control. However, how we view it, is completely our choice.

Inevitable changes

Change is a bit like time. It’s constantly happening and has an effect on us and the things around us. When we learn to work with it, it becomes our partner. If we fight it, we run the risk of creating chaos and stress.

Inevitable changes include things like nature, the seasons, tides, aging, and climate. Changes in the seasons, and nature we accept because we have no influence on them. These changes are often the inspiration for many beautiful things such as the incredible changing colours of a sunset or the changes a chrysalis goes through to become a beautiful butterfly. These changes are inevitable, and we accept them as a part of life.

  Agingis a change that, when we are younger, we wish would happen faster and as we age we wish it would slow down. There is a huge industry based on the changes we go through as human beings. Billions of dollars are spent trying to change the process of aging. Some cultures have another perspective on this. The young have outer beauty, while the elders have a rich inner beauty called wisdom. All wisdom is built from many moments of experience. Each one of these moments was a moment of change.

In our fast paced world we contribute to climate change. Although we are not necessarily directly in control of it, we can choose to make a positive difference in our own way. Every little bit counts. Saab plant trees to offset the emissions from their cars. Choosing to recycle helps reduce the waste going into our landfills.

Changing perspectives
Change is another word for opportunity. Every change offers an opportunity to make a choice. We can choose to be a victim of the change, or create something new and make it work for us.

The degree of the change can sometimes overwhelm us. It’s natural to have fear initially. This is one of our defense systems. We are all human, and we all have both positive and negative feelings. What makes the difference is how long you choose to hold onto the fear or negativity. The faster you choose to let it go and change your focus to something productive, the quicker you will create great results.

We all have patterns and habits we’ve had for a lifetime about change and how we view it. Active education is the best way to change your perspective and break old habits. By active education we mean putting what you learn into action immediately. You can only truly learn something once you’ve experienced it. We are constantly changing the resources to help you with this, so make sure you keep an eye on the website.

Reducing stress
Change can be stressful for some people. The best way I’ve found to reduce stress is to firstly, take myself out of the situation and imagine I am advising someone else on what to do. This helps to alleviate the emotion so you can do a reality check and take a good look at what is actually happening. From this perspective you can look for the opportunities this change may represent.

Be careful to assess where you are making assumptions. Assumptions are the imaginary rules we put in our way that block possibilities.

There is often fear associated with change. Fear can create the feeling of stress. Most often fear is based on what you imagine is going to happen, rather than what is actually fact. When you begin to feel that fear, ask yourself "What do I know to be absolutely true in this situation?” Don’t allow yourself to dwell on imaginary possibilities. Identify what’s real and what’s not, and concentrate on reality. Let your mind be creative in developing positive outcomes. Your mind can only hold one piece of information at any given moment. If it is holding a positive thought, there is no room for negative thoughts.

Some changes can be planned for in advance. This also helps to reduce stress. In business we talk about strategic planning where we look to the future and devise plans for how to deal with the major changes that could possibly affect our business in the future. We may not know which one is going to happen or when but if something does eventuate, we already have a plan on how to approach it.

We can do the same thing with any area of our lives. This process can be very creative, so you may even develop ideas that you would never have otherwise thought about. Brainstorming is a great way to come up with options and solutions. For more information on brainstorming check out www.choosethetude.com/....

Changing times
As change is constantly happening, we might as well learn to work with it and choose to make it work for us.

As Gary Zukav says in his book titled The Mind of the Soul - Responsible Choice, "You cannot change yourself by wishing, thinking, wanting or desiring. You must change. When you do, you will cease to attract people who wish, think, want and desire to change. You will step into a new domain of experience, and you will find new friends there."

At Choose the ‘Tude we have recently had the opportunity to change where we do business. Firstly, not only are our products and services available throughout New Zealand, earlier this year we opened in Australia! A huge change and a huge opportunity!

Secondly, as a result of turning change into an opportunity we have restructured how we do business and we have realized another dream – to make the business so flexible we can work from anywhere. Being a web based company we able to move quickly to make the most of opportunities when they arise. This means we will be moving, which brings opens up many more possibilities.

Changing how you think about things brings so many opportunities. If you want to achieve more than you already have, change your thinking and your actions.

It’s time for change!

 

Author: Robyn Simpson from Choose The 'Tude!

Inspire 10 people to inspire 10 people… pass it on!