you have everything you want? Are you where you thought you would be at
this stage in your life? No? A contributing factor could be your goals,
how you set them, and achieve them - or not.
Whilst discussing an idea I was formulating for a new business with a colleague of mine two statements were made that really stuck with me about goal setting. Firstly, my colleague commented that he didn't like to set goals because if he didn't achieve them he would feel he had failed. His question "Why put myself out there?"
Secondly, he referred to me as 'a dreamer' insinuating that dreaming was a waste of time and not particularly productive. My response "Yes, I'm a dreamer. But I dream with deadlines."
I strongly believe people can achieve anything they want if they put their mind to it. So, what stops us from setting goals? What stops us from achieving them? Blocks! These are things that get in the way (real or imagined) that stop us from taking action and succeeding. I'd like to share with you some of the blocks I've identified and strategies for breaking these blocks.
Block 1. Constant dreaming - No time frame
This often leads to no action being taken. There is no urgency to achieve the dream, so it tends to float along, never really eventuating other than in your head. "I'm gonna..." is the case here and rarely 'gonna' eventuates.
BREAK IT: Take a look at how much you really want to make this dream a reality. If it's something you are seriously passionate about achieving then put a deadline on it. When you put a deadline on a dream it becomes a goal and the subconscious mind begins to find ways to make it happen. What you focus on is what you get.
The common misconception here is that if you miss a deadline, you have failed. This is only true if you choose it to be so. If you find yourself in this situation, take stock of all the things you achieved along the way. Congratulate yourself for them, and set another deadline by which to meet your ultimate goal.
Remember, goals are dreams with deadlines and deadlines work! As an example, an exciting new design based on this concept has eventuated for this company Choose the 'Tude Ltd. Check these out here.
Block 2. Worrying about what others will think about you
How do you feel about achieving this goal? Do you fear what other people might think or say? Do you worry that you may fail if you attempt it? How will that make you feel? If you're focusing on the negatives and what might happen, that's what will happen.
BREAK IT: Reality check! People haven't said or thought anything yet because you haven't done anything! And whose goal is it? Yours! So don't worry about what other people have to say. Get on with it and take some action.
Block 3. Not believing in yourself
We are our own worst critics! Humans are complex creatures. Our minds, past behaviours and beliefs often get in the way - even though they may bear little relevance to our situation today.
BREAK IT: Identifying and getting rid of limiting beliefs about ourselves and our abilities can take a bit of work. There is no quick fix here. If you identify the belief that is getting in your way you can begin to work with it. You can get a coach or learn how to deal with it yourself through training or reading (see our Resources Section for help here). This is a great investment in your future!
A mistake people often make is to talk to people who reinforce limiting beliefs or say "it can't be done". If you listen to all the reasons why you can't/couldn't/won't achieve it - you won't achieve it. Often it is our own inner voice that is doing the negative talk and tells us it can't be done.
BREAK IT: Talk to people who are supportive and will help you look at possibilities and ways to achieve what you want rather than those who are stifled by fear. Take notice of the other people who have achieved what you want. 99% of the time, someone else (if not many people) has already achieved it - which is great because it means it can be done. Now focus on how they did it and do it yourself.
If it's your own internal chatter that is knocking you - take a look at the Break for Not believing in yourself (Block 3).
You can achieve anything you want if you put your mind to it and take action. Challenge yourself - write down what you really want... in life, in relationships, in your business/career. Identify the Blocks and begin breaking them!
To be continued... See Goals are Dreams with Deadlines - Part II for more blocks and how to break them.
The business I referred to in my introduction is Choose the 'Tude. This business is one of the dreams I set with a deadline. It works!
Author: Robyn Simpson from Choose The 'Tude!
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